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How to Evoke Main Character Energy

Photo via @Chola_girl on twitter

Are you the main character of your story? Do you come before anyone and everything in your life? Do people notice you when you walk by or are you the sidekick? Do you fall into the category of the best friend? Are you always putting yourself last while putting everyone else before you and your needs? If you have been hearing about main character energy lately and wanting to know how to evoke it into your own life, keep reading.


Put your needs first

On an airplane they tell you incase of an emergency to put on your oxygen mask first. They don’t insist you put on your children’s, your spouses, your mother or fathers, your best friend, cousin, manager, no they tell you to put on your mask. Why? Because if you are passed out, you can’t help anyone else, not even yourself. A big component of main character energy is making sure your needs are above anyone else’s, that’s right even your children. If mom is burnt out, overworked, stressed, chronically tired, that is going to pour out into your children as well. If you don’t have kid’s it’s even easier to practice this. Start by making sure that your basic needs are met. You have healthy food, shelter, clothes, once these basic needs are met go further by insuring you are getting enough rest each night, drinking enough water, eating healthy and plant based as often as possible as well as getting adequate exercise during the week. By putting your basic needs first, you are then able to be a better, healthier, more sane version of yourself, which in turn will allow you to be there for others when you need to be.

Envision your highest self 

Who is the woman you vision yourself to be? Who is your best self? Who is the woman that when you don’t show up as her, you find yourself disappointed in yourself. When you have a clear picture of the person you want to be, it is easier for you to show up as them. Would your highest self be rude or nasty to people? Would your highest self speak down on herself? Would your highest self stalk your ex online? Would your highest self allow someone else to take credit for the project you worked your butt off on? Would she stay in a dead end job for security? Would she stay in an unfulfilling relationship? Would she go days or weeks without exercise? If she wouldn’t do it, then you stop doing it. Each day when you notice you are doing something outside of the character of your highest self, stop yourself in your tracks and refocus. Focus on being more positive, loving to yourself and others, grateful. Whenever you find yourself being anything less than the highest version of yourself, first allow yourself grace, next work on redirecting and repositioning yourself.

Be confident in who you are

Being confident can sometimes be easier said than done. Being confident however is something anyone can achieve. You don’t have to be the most talented, smartest, most beautiful person on earth to be confident. Own who you are. What is it that makes you different? What is something that you love about yourself? Own that. Own your flaws. Own the things that have made you stand out. Own your quirks. Own your mistakes. Own you! Walk straight, smile, make eye contact, be friendly. Be confident in who it is that you are and what it is that you came to achieve.

Own the room

Owning the room starts with being confident. Practice this wherever you go. It doesn’t matter if you are at the grocery store or the Grammys. Walk in like you own the place. Back straight, head high, eye contact, smile. Always look like you are going somewhere important and people will be curious about you. The main character doesn’t have to be perfect and have it all together, but best believe people are always watching because they are intrigued. Wear a staple piece. It can be a ring, necklace, sweater, sneaker, heel, glasses, heck face mask, whatever it is that makes you feel more confident, add it to your wardrobe and rock it whenever you need an extra boost of external confidence.

Become more interesting 

Main characters aren’t boring, they have hobbies. Main characters are not conventional. They volunteer to help newly hatched sea turtles off to sea, they take up a rare martial arts that no one has ever heard of, they collect vintage comic books, they go to karaoke on Tuesdays, they write dark poetry, they learn cantonese just because, do something different. Take up a new hobby. Get off the couch and onto a surf board. You may not know what your thing is yet, but the only way to find out is to try. Go to the park and read on Sundays, go hiking, mentor a kid, just do something different, something gratifying and something that adds an extra quirk to who you are.

Being the main character is something we all have within us. Main characters make bold decisions. They don’t sit around waiting for anyone else to give them permission to live their life the way they want to. Main characters are decision makers. They may not always be confident but they have a way of faking it until they make it and inviting us all to join in on their quirky adventures along the way. Do it scared. Do it unprepared. Do it worried. Just make sure you do it!


Are you the main character of your story?